my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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