i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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