im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
