i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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