super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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