I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
