the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
