His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
well most of my day revolves around power hour
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
