i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
