I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
