You work out of a Hotel?
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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