You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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