just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
