Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Randomize