I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
