I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Randomize
