The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
