My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
