Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize