Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
We need a shit load of segways right now
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
