uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
