This girl is more easily done than said...
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize