Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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