Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
