I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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