Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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