Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
