mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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