Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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