I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
