I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
