It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Randomize
