Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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