We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
