is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
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