She announced her abortion via fbk
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
