ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
