I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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