Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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