Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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