Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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