so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
