that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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