hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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