would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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