Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Randomize
