i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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