is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
