no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
We don't watch enough power rangers
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
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