Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Im part way to drunk.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Randomize